The Intentional Divorce Library
Divorce comes with more financial questions than anyone expects. This is where you'll find real answers on asset division, budgeting, retirement, and the mistakes that quietly cost women the most, written by a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst who has helped clients navigate exactly what you're facing now.
No fluff, no fear tactics. Just the information you need to make clear-eyed decisions and protect the life you're building next.
Not sure where to start?
Every article here is written for a particular moment. Start with the stage that matches where you are, and you will find the handful of pieces that actually apply to you.
- I am considering divorce. Can I afford it, what happens to the house, what should I know before talking to an attorney.
- I am preparing for divorce. Documents, credit, insurance, retirement accounts, and choosing your professional team.
- I am going through divorce. The house, support, dividing retirement, QDROs, taxes, and evaluating a settlement.
- My divorce is final. Retitling assets, confirming the QDRO, beneficiaries, rebuilding cash flow and credit.
Browsing by topic instead? Every category is listed in the sidebar, from QDROs and the family home to co-parenting and life after divorce.
Pre-mediation coaching is structured preparation before you sit down to mediate: understanding what will actually happen, deciding what you want and what you can trade, and building the skills to stay regulated when the conversation gets hard. It is usually one or two sessions in the week beforehand...
Writing a letter of gratitude to an ex is not something most people plan to do. In the early weeks and months after a divorce, gratitude is usually the last thing on your mind.
But for those navigating life as co-parents after divorce, something can shift. The person who once felt like an adversary...
If your husband asked for a divorce, you are likely experiencing a lot of different emotions. Take a step back and breathe. It might not feel like it right now, but you are going to be okay.
The first thing you should do is start taking really good care of yourself. This may seem like a strange reco...
Divorce is one of the most emotionally complex experiences a person can go through. Even if you know it's the right decision, the grief, uncertainty, and upheaval can feel completely overwhelming. That's why I want to talk about one of the most powerful and underrated tools available to you right no...
Social media has become such an important part of our lives. However, when going through a divorce, you may want to be a little more cautious. I am thrilled to welcome guest blogger, Elizabeth Billies, to share the seven don'ts of social media during a divorce.
7 Tips for Social Media During Your D...
Life after divorce is a season unlike any other. You're grieving something that once mattered deeply, while simultaneously trying to build something new, often without a clear map for how to do either. If you've found yourself searching for words that make sense of what you're feeling, you're in the...
Raise mediation at a calm moment, not in the middle of a conflict. Lead with what your spouse gains rather than what you want: lower cost, more control, and privacy. Keep the first ask short and make it a question rather than a decision you have already taken. If direct conversation reliably goes ba...
Change can be difficult whether you choose to make changes in your life or someone else has made that choice for you. Let's face it. Divorce changes many facets of your life and will test your ability to handle change to an extreme.
Some people struggle more than others with change. They fight it, ...
When a child refuses to visit their other parent, the usual cause is the transition itself rather than the other parent. Consistency is what fixes it: keep the routine predictable, keep your own anxiety off your face, let them bring familiar things, and prepare them in advance. Unless there is negle...
It may or may not come as a surprise to you that a pension is frequently the largest asset negotiated in a divorce. With that said, it's not a foregone conclusion that you'll have to give up a portion of your pension as part of your divorce settlement. I'm surprised by the number of cases I see in w...
Most divorce mediations take two to four two-hour sessions, following an initial orientation session where the process is explained and both parties sign the agreement to mediate. Calendar time depends far more on how quickly you can both get in the room than on the number of sessions. Couples who s...
When I was dealing with my breakup, I felt a wide range of emotions - everything from sadness to shame to anger and back again. Sometimes in a matter of minutes. On my best days, I wasn't being very kind to myself and on my worst days, I was my own worst enemy.
When you're dealing with a bre...
