The Intentional Divorce Library
Divorce comes with more financial questions than anyone expects. This is where you'll find real answers on asset division, budgeting, retirement, and the mistakes that quietly cost women the most, written by a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst who has helped clients navigate exactly what you're facing now.
No fluff, no fear tactics. Just the information you need to make clear-eyed decisions and protect the life you're building next.
Not sure where to start?
Every article here is written for a particular moment. Start with the stage that matches where you are, and you will find the handful of pieces that actually apply to you.
- I am considering divorce. Can I afford it, what happens to the house, what should I know before talking to an attorney.
- I am preparing for divorce. Documents, credit, insurance, retirement accounts, and choosing your professional team.
- I am going through divorce. The house, support, dividing retirement, QDROs, taxes, and evaluating a settlement.
- My divorce is final. Retitling assets, confirming the QDRO, beneficiaries, rebuilding cash flow and credit.
Browsing by topic instead? Every category is listed in the sidebar, from QDROs and the family home to co-parenting and life after divorce.
This question comes up more than you would think, usually because a car has picked the worst possible moment to die.
The honest answer is that it depends, and the things it depends on are worth understanding before you sign anything. A car is often the largest purchase a woman makes while her divorc...
If you have walked out of a meeting with your attorney knowing that a lot was said but not what was decided, you are in good company. Knowing how to talk to your divorce attorney is a skill, and almost no one is taught it before they need it.
There are three moves that help, all borrowed from basic ...
After more than 20 years of working with divorcing clients as a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst, I have seen a lot. I have sat across the table from women who were sharp, capable, and completely blindsided by the financial consequences of decisions they made during their divorce. Not because the...
When you're in the middle of a divorce, everyone seems to have an opinion about what you should do. Get a lawyer. See a therapist. Talk to your pastor. Call your sister.
The advice is well-meaning, but it can also leave you more confused than when you started.
One question I hear a lot from the peo...
One of the most common questions I hear from women sitting across from me is some version of: "Can I actually afford to do this?"
They are not asking because they want to stay in a painful marriage. They are asking because they are terrified of the financial unknown. They have heard horror stories. ...
A certified divorce coach is a divorce coach who has completed a structured training program through a recognized certifying body, passed a competency assessment, and agreed to follow that body's code of ethics. Divorce coaching is not a licensed profession, so there is no state board deciding who m...
I need to tell you something that might sound counterintuitive when you're in the thick of divorce:
This isn't a battle to win. It's a puzzle to solve.
I know that feels wrong when emotions are running high. When you feel betrayed. When your attorney is talking about "leverage" and "positioning." Wh...
Divorce is one of the most financially significant events of your life. Every decision from how you divide retirement accounts to whether you keep the house can shape your financial security for decades. One of the most common questions I hear from women going through this transition is: “Do I need ...
Divorce changes everything. Even when it’s the right decision, it can leave you wondering who you are now and what comes next. If you’re trying to figure out how to pivot after divorce, you’re not alone. The transition into life after divorce often requires more than practical adjustments. It calls ...
by Liesel Darby, ADR Certified Divorce Coach, Divorce Mediator
You Deserve More Than a Sandwich Over the Sink – A Story of Self-Care After Divorce
You may be wondering about the title for this blog—"That’s a weird thing to say, what’s that about?” I was thinking about how far I’ve come since the ve...
Divorce at any age is hard. But when you are over 50, the financial stakes are different.
You do not have 20 years to rebuild. The decisions you make about your retirement accounts, your home, your Social Security, and your settlement are decisions you will live with for the rest of your life. That
...
by Liesel Darby, M.Ed., M.A., CC - Divorce Mediator & Certified Divorce Coach
Two Words for the Same Moment
Consider the word "chaos." The images that come to my mind all have speed in them. Something happened fast, out of the blue, and your world is suddenly upside down. Chaos is the opposite of co...
