Emotions and Divorce Mediation: 7 Tips for Success

mediation Jul 02, 2019

Your spouse cheated. He or she is leaving you for someone else. Perhaps you've argued for years and just finally had enough. Regardless of the reason, for the vast majority of cases, divorce is emotional. People are emotional. Deciding how your life will be after a divorce is emotional.

Unfortunately, making sound decisions while emotions are running high doesn't work. When we get emotional, we stop thinking rationally, which can lead us to do and say things that we will regret later. It's easy to blow up an important part of the settlement agreement by letting anger and frustration get the better of you. When emotions take over, we stop listening to the other person and focus on the feelings instead of the goals we have for the negotiation.

Emotions and Divorce Mediation: 7 Tips for Success

So, how do you stay unemotional in a situation that is going to have such a big impact on your future? Use the following tips to keep you on track, both with your emotions and divorce...

Continue Reading...

5 Mediation Strategies to Get What You Want

mediation Jan 24, 2019

I strongly believe in the benefits of choosing mediation for your divorce but it's also important to understand the challenges and prepare for those. The decisions made in mediation can significantly impact your life for years to come. With that in mind, it can be easy to become overwhelmed during the session if you are not adequately prepared. Likewise, you can make agreements that may not be in your best interest if you are simply tired and worn out from the mediation. These simple mediation strategies can help you get what you want from your divorce settlement.

Keep these strategies in mind to make the most of your mediation

#1 Take Time to Reflect Ahead of Time

Spend some quiet time thinking about what you want and what you need.  Write your thoughts down on paper and read it aloud.  This process helps you organize your thoughts, identify your priorities and set realistic expectations.  Take this paper with you to mediation.  If you are...

Continue Reading...

Shared Parenting Plan Checklist

I often find myself sitting in mediation with couples who are looking for guidance when it comes to creating a parenting plan. The beauty of mediation is that you can create a parenting plan that is going to work best for your children and your family and quite frankly, it really does not matter what everyone else is doing. That said, there are certain elements that, from a practical standpoint, you may want to address. Here is a parenting plan checklist of items to consider.

What is a Shared Parenting Plan?

Before I get ahead of myself, what is a Shared Parenting Plan? It is a written document that details how you will co-parent. If you take the time to think through future parenting challenges that may arise, it can really take a lot of stress out of co-parenting. It's like a guidebook that you have created for yourselves. When we discuss your plans for shared parenting in mediation, you can determine how detailed to get. There is a Shared Parenting Agreement that will...

Continue Reading...

How to Prepare for Mediation: Divorce Mediation Checklist

mediation Dec 19, 2017

In my online course, "How to Prepare for Divorce," I go in-depth on how to prepare for divorce and mediation, specifically, if that's the process you choose to use. At a high level, here is a brief divorce mediation checklist to help you prepare for your first appointment.

Divorce Mediation Checklist: Questions for the Mediator

Make a list of questions that you have for the mediator. Before agreeing to use the mediator, both you and your spouse should have an opportunity to speak with him/her. You'll want to ask about:

  • Mediator's experience
  • Cost of mediation/fees
  • Availability for meetings
  • Experience mediating the specific issues that will be dealt with in your divorce

Divorce Mediation Checklist: List Your Concerns

Make a list of all of your concerns. You may not address them in your first appointment but it's important to start writing them down. To keep yourself organized, try to cluster your concerns about a specific topic. For example, make a list of all of the concerns you...

Continue Reading...

3 Mindset Shifts to Make as You Prepare for Mediation

guest blogger mediation May 30, 2017

The following is a guest post written by Erica N. Reed, LCSW-C. Additional information about Erica can be found below.

As you planned the wedding ceremony and created your life together, the last thing you anticipated was scheduling a meeting to dissolve the marriage.  Whether the marriage had been in turmoil for a while, or you were caught off guard by the request for separation, women who are in the process of separation and divorce are on an emotional roller coaster and are simply trying to find stable footing.

Experiencing anger, sadness, hurt, fear, and resentment are to be expected during this time.   It’s very typical.  However, when entering mediation, these emotions can sabotage a successful outcome.

Here are three mindset shifts that are important for you to address as you prepare for mediation with your spouse.

Embrace Calm

Do you remember that emotional roller coaster I spoke about?  I’m sure you can...

Continue Reading...
Close

Stay connected with our latest news and resources

Your privacy is important us. We promise we will not share your information with anyone.