The Intentional Divorce Library
Divorce comes with more financial questions than anyone expects. This is where you'll find real answers on asset division, budgeting, retirement, and the mistakes that quietly cost women the most, written by a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst who has helped clients navigate exactly what you're facing now.
No fluff, no fear tactics. Just the information you need to make clear-eyed decisions and protect the life you're building next.
Not sure where to start?
Every article here is written for a particular moment. Start with the stage that matches where you are, and you will find the handful of pieces that actually apply to you.
- I am considering divorce. Can I afford it, what happens to the house, what should I know before talking to an attorney.
- I am preparing for divorce. Documents, credit, insurance, retirement accounts, and choosing your professional team.
- I am going through divorce. The house, support, dividing retirement, QDROs, taxes, and evaluating a settlement.
- My divorce is final. Retitling assets, confirming the QDRO, beneficiaries, rebuilding cash flow and credit.
Browsing by topic instead? Every category is listed in the sidebar, from QDROs and the family home to co-parenting and life after divorce.
A holiday boundary is simply a clear expectation about how you will interact. Examples include answering non-emergency messages during business hours only, following the parenting plan as agreed, and declining joint family events if they cost more than they give. State it calmly once, then follow th...
If you are adjusting to new financial realities after a divorce, the holiday season can feel more overwhelming than joyful. The short version is to set a number before you shop, decide what actually matters to you this year rather than matching last year, keep credit out of it where you can, and rem...
The holiday season is already full. Decorating, shopping, baking, parties. Then add school concerts, class parties, and big projects due before winter break. For divorced parents, all of that sits on top of figuring out how to split the time and still make the season special for your kids.
It's no w...
The holidays are about family and time together, which can make them feel complicated after a divorce. You want the season to be special for your kids, and you're figuring out a whole new way of doing it, often while working through your own feelings at the same time.
I still remember my first Chris...
For a lot of women, Thanksgiving is the first big holiday after divorce. Even if you've been divorced for years, the season can still sting. November and December are full of traditions, and many of them were built around the family you had before.
Here's what I see happen again and again. People t...
Your first holiday season after divorce is going to be different. I still remember my first Christmas. I worked so hard to keep our routines as close to normal as possible, especially for my then-toddler, while my own emotions were all over the place.
So if you're in that season right now, I feel fo...
The holidays are hard enough on their own. Add divorce to the mix and suddenly every twinkling light, every family gathering, every song on the radio can feel like a small ambush.
Your first set of holidays after divorce will be weird, scary, and painful. But they can also hold moments of genuine j...
Decide what you are going to say about your divorce before the subject comes up at the table, and keep it short. You do not owe anyone a full account. Ask family to stay out of the parts that are not theirs, like picking sides, giving legal or financial advice, shaming your ex, criticizing your sett...
The first Christmas after divorce is the hardest one, and it helps to expect that rather than be blindsided by it. Set your expectations low, decide the schedule with your co-parent in advance, keep the traditions that still feel right and replace the ones that don't, and give yourself permission to...
Writing a letter of gratitude to an ex is not something most people plan to do. In the early weeks and months after a divorce, gratitude is usually the last thing on your mind.
But for those navigating life as co-parents after divorce, something can shift. The person who once felt like an adversary...
The holidays during or after a divorce are hardest the first year, and they get easier. What helps most is to agree on the schedule with your co-parent early rather than in December, decide in advance what you will say to family so you are not improvising over dinner, keep the traditions that still ...
Your first holidays after divorce may also be your first holidays on one income. That can make the season feel more stressful than joyful. The single most helpful thing you can do is set your holiday budget before you start shopping, not after.
A budget isn't about saying no to everything. It's a pe...
