The Intentional Divorce Library

Divorce comes with more financial questions than anyone expects. This is where you'll find real answers on asset division, budgeting, retirement, and the mistakes that quietly cost women the most, written by a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst who has helped clients navigate exactly what you're facing now.

No fluff, no fear tactics. Just the information you need to make clear-eyed decisions and protect the life you're building next.

Not sure where to start?

Every article here is written for a particular moment. Start with the stage that matches where you are, and you will find the handful of pieces that actually apply to you.

Browsing by topic instead? Every category is listed in the sidebar, from QDROs and the family home to co-parenting and life after divorce.

5 Ways to Help Create a Happy Holiday for Your Kids co-parenting holidays kids and divorce

Holidays are a time for family, friends and spending time together, but this can be very complicated if you’re divorced and are trying to figure out how to make it a great holiday for your kids. And if it’s your first Christmas after a divorce, there will definitely be challenges. 

I still remember...

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What I Wish I Knew Before My Divorce: Part 3 co-parenting financial planning health insurance kids and divorce life after divorce mediation preparing for divorce

This is part of a 3-part series on what women wish they knew before their divorce. You're reading: Part 3 Also in this series: Part 1 — Insurance, process, relationships, and self-care | Part 2 — College, agreements, exhaustion, and mindset

Divorce can be a bit like a special club that you never an...

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Resources for Your First Holiday After Divorce co-parenting holidays life after divorce

Your first Christmas or holiday after your divorce is going to be different. I still remember my first Christmas. I struggled to keep my routines as close to “normal” as possible, especially for my then-toddler. It’s a special circle of emotions that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy.

So, my friend...

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3 Things Divorced Parents Need to Plan for the College Transition co-parenting

It doesn’t matter if you’re married or divorced, different people have different ideas about how to transition their children into adults. While you may be in favor of providing full financial support, your co-parent may have other ideas. For that matter, even different states’ laws handle the trans...

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What I Wish I Knew Before My Divorce: Part 1 co-parenting financial planning health insurance kids and divorce life after divorce life insurance preparing for divorce

This is part of a 3-part series on what women wish they knew before their divorce. You're reading: Part 1 Also in this series: Part 2 — College, agreements, exhaustion, and mindset | Part 3 — Mediation, priorities, state laws, and happiness

When I think back to the time during and even before my div...

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Helping Teenagers Through Divorce: What Actually Works co-parenting kids and divorce

Teenagers process divorce differently from younger children. They need less reassurance about logistics and more honesty about what is actually happening, without adult details. Expect anger, expect them to pull away, and expect them to want a say in the schedule. The parenting plan matters more at ...

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Resolve to Be a Better Co-Parent co-parenting kids and divorce life after divorce

It's that time of year again where many of us are considering how we might be better or do better in the new year with New Year's resolutions. If parenting with your ex has been a significant struggle in your life, I want to challenge you to resolve to be a better co-parent this year. If you don't w...

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Co-Parenting Conflict: How to De-Escalate With Your Ex co-parenting kids and divorce

De-escalating co-parenting conflict comes down to four habits: slow your response time down, keep your tone deliberately neutral, stop treating your ex's choices as a competition, and never bring the marriage into a conversation about the children. Most co-parenting arguments escalate because someon...

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Your First Christmas After Divorce: How to Get Through It co-parenting holidays kids and divorce life after divorce

The first Christmas after divorce is the hardest one, and it helps to expect that rather than be blindsided by it. Set your expectations low, decide the schedule with your co-parent in advance, keep the traditions that still feel right and replace the ones that don't, and give yourself permission to...

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A Letter of Gratitude to My Ex: What Co-Parenting with Appreciation Really Looks Like co-parenting divorce coach holidays kids and divorce life after divorce

Writing a letter of gratitude to an ex is not something most people plan to do. In the early weeks and months after a divorce, gratitude is usually the last thing on your mind.

But for those navigating life as co-parents after divorce, something can shift. The person who once felt like an adversary...

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When Your Child Refuses to Visit the Other Parent co-parenting kids and divorce

When a child refuses to visit their other parent, the usual cause is the transition itself rather than the other parent. Consistency is what fixes it: keep the routine predictable, keep your own anxiety off your face, let them bring familiar things, and prepare them in advance. Unless there is negle...

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FAFSA Tips for Divorced Parents co-parenting college financial aid going through divorce

Looking for FAFSA tips for divorced parents? In many of my divorce cases, how college expenses will be handled is an issue that needs to be addressed. It's common for parents to wait to divorce until their children are teenagers or young adults. This tends to be around the same time that people are ...

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