Your first Christmas or holiday after your divorce is going to be different. I still remember my first Christmas. I struggled to keep my routines as close to “normal” as possible, especially for my then-toddler. It’s a special circle of emotions that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy.
So, my friend, if you’re going through this, I really feel for you right now. It will get better (I know, it doesn’t feel like it, but I will) and hopefully these resources for getting through your first holiday after divorce will help.
Being kind to yourself can be so hard right now. Lots of “failures” are playing on repeat, so it’s easy to sit with that all day long and think that you yourself are one of them. I promise, you are not. If you need to show yourself some self-care right now, here are 4 ways to be kind to yourself when dealing with a breakup.
I turn to journaling when I’m experiencing times of stress or struggle, so you best believe I went through a lot of paper, especially during the holidays after my divorce when emotions were high! If you find solace in journaling (or if you’re new to journaling and would like to try this practice to see how it makes you feel), use this list of 30 journal prompts to get you through your first holiday (or any time) after your divorce.
Mindset shifts aren’t always easy to make in the short-term, but at the end of the day, having a happier outlook will make for a happier day-to-day life. These five mindset shifts will help ease that trauma and hopefully have you looking at things from a new perspective.
I often find that knowing what to expect eases a lot of pain and anxiety. It takes some of the overwhelm out and helps you look for points that you’re familiar with when the time comes. Here’s a candid look at your first Christmas after divorce and a few ways to make the time a little less melancholic.
Speaking of anxiety… Talking to your friends and family about your divorce, especially if it’s recent, is something that will come up that I’d implore you to be prepared for. Like knowing what to expect, having a script prepared for a few situations will ease that anxiousness and allow you to present only what you want when talking about your divorce.
Social media is inherent to our days, as much as breathing or drinking water it seems! So, before you post that rant or that picture…think long and hard about it! Make sure that you’re keeping your social media usage reasonable so you don’t have to explain anything or show pictures to anyone that you don’t want. Here are 7 tips for using social media during your divorce.
Co-parenting can be challenging on the best days. During the holidays when you want to make sure your kids are spending lots of special time with their family, tensions and conflict could flare up. Here are a few strategies for overcoming co-parenting conflicts.
Now that you’ve resolved conflicts, resolve to be a better co-parent. Especially if this is just your first holiday after divorce, there will be plenty more. Getting on the same page and forming a reasonable co-parenting relationship with your ex will ensure the next holidays are much better. Use these strategies to improve your co-parenting relationship.
And, if all else fails…quotes! These are my favorite quotes about gratitude and these are a few that will have you laughing and thinking about your first holiday after divorce a little differently.
At the end of the day, you can do the best you can to survive. (Speaking of surviving, here are six survival tips for dealing with divorce during the holidays.) I hope you find courage, peace, and joy in these tough times. As they say, these times are tough but you’re tougher. You can do this!