Thinking About Divorce Does Not Mean You Have to Decide Today

If You Are Asking These Questions, You Are in the Right Place

Most women who reach this page are not looking for permission. They are looking for information, and for a sense of what their life could realistically look like on the other side.

• Can I afford to live on my own?
• What would happen to the house?
• Would I receive support, or pay it?
• What if I do not fully understand our finances?
• What should I do before I talk to an attorney?
• How would this affect my retirement?
• What if I am not ready to make a decision at all?

Every one of these has an answer. Some of them you can begin answering this week, quietly, without anyone else knowing.

What Is Worth Doing at This Stage

You do not need to understand the whole divorce process today. You need a clearer picture of where you actually stand.

1. Build an initial financial inventory. Accounts, balances, debts, and where the documents live.
2. Understand household income and spending. What comes in, what goes out, and what is fixed.
3. Review your credit. Pull your own report and see what is in your name.
4. Gather information without making sudden financial moves. Moving or hiding money creates problems later.
5. Learn your process options. Mediation, collaborative, and litigation lead to very different experiences and costs.
6. Identify who you would want in your corner. An attorney, a financial professional, a therapist, a coach.
7. Think about the life you want to be able to build afterward. That answer shapes every decision that follows.

A note worth reading twice: general education is not legal, tax, or individualized financial advice. Before you move, transfer, close, or liquidate anything, talk to a professional about your specific situation.

Start With These

Written for exactly where you are right now.

• Can I afford to get divorced? The question underneath most of the others.
• Seven signs of an impending divorce, and what to do next
• My husband wants a divorce. What should I do?
• Does my state have alimony?
• Financial abuse: five steps to a solid financial foundation
• Common divorce myths that could cost you money
• Ten ways to save money on your divorce
• Four ways a CDFA can reduce your stress before you file

See all resources for this stage

When It Helps to Talk to Someone

Intentional Divorce Solutions is not a law firm and does not give legal advice. What we do is help you understand the financial and practical side of a decision like this, so you can weigh it properly.

If you want to understand the numbers, a conversation about divorce financial planning can show you what your finances would realistically look like apart, before you commit to anything.

If the hardest part is the decision itself, divorce coaching helps you get organised, think clearly, and prepare for conversations you are dreading.

If you and your spouse are both considering a respectful process, it is worth reading how divorce mediation works before either of you hires anyone.

Not sure which of those you need? That is a normal place to start, and it is what a first conversation is for.