Leah Hadley [00:00:01]:
Welcome to Intentional Divorce Insights. I'm Leah Hadley, certified divorce financial analyst, accredited financial counselor, and the founder of Intentional Divorce Solutions. I'll be your guide through the complexities of divorce, finance and emotional wellness. Join me as we uncover practical tips and empowering insights to help you navigate your divorce with clarity and intention.
Leah Hadley [00:00:25]:
Hi there, and welcome back to another episode of Intentional Divorce Insights. Now, today's episode is extra special because it marks the end of season four. So I want to take a moment and I want to thank you. Whether you are a longtime listener or you found the show recently while navigating a tough chapter, I am truly grateful that you are here. This season has been full of powerful conversations, emotional breakthroughs, and practical guidance for your journey through divorce and beyond. And as we wrap up the season, I thought we had closed the year together with a fresh start, a moment to take a breath, reflect, and set the tone for what comes next. Because the truth is that early December is one of the most powerful times of the year to reset your financial life and reconnect with what matters most. December can offer clarity.
Leah Hadley [00:01:21]:
It can offer space. It offers the chance to decide the kind of person you want to be stepping into the new year. Right? So today we're going to talk about what it means to create a financial fresh start after divorce and how to step into 2026 with clarity, with confidence, and with intention. So let's talk about first, why does this time of year matter? Fact of the matter is it can bring up a lot, especially for those who have gone through a divorce. And those emotions often come in waves. One moment you might feel reflective about how far you've come, and the next, you may feel completely overwhelmed by everything that still feels uncertain. And then suddenly, a new sense of hope might break through. So it's a complex season, and there's nothing wrong with you if you are feeling it all at once.
Leah Hadley [00:02:17]:
So let's be clear about that. If you're carrying mixed emotions right now, I want you to know you're not alone. This time of year tends to magnify whatever we've been navigating beneath the surface. So whether that's the healing, it's the courage, it's the exhaustion, it's the growth. Divorce changes everything, right? It reshapes your routines, your holidays, your finances, sometimes even your identity. So it makes complete sense that December would stir up some deeper reflection than what might be typical for you. What makes this season powerful, though, is that it naturally invites us to kind of slow down, check in with ourselves. It does create Some space to take a step back and ask some really important questions.
Leah Hadley [00:03:03]:
Like what am I ready to bring with me into the new year? What habits, beliefs, financial patterns am I ready to release? Who am I becoming? And what does she need from me right now? Contrary to what we've all been taught, fresh starts do not magically appear on January 1st. They don't come from buying a new planner, although sometimes I wish they did, or setting out 10 resolutions that you're going to forget by February. Fresh starts are created through intentional choices, through small shifts, through honest conversations with yourself. And the choices usually begin with long before the calendar changes. So that's why this is, it really is a powerful moment. December gives you room to soften, gives you space to regroup, to plan with clarity instead of with that urgency that comes with normal day to day life. It gives you the emotional and mental distance to look at your financial life with fresh eyes and choose what's going to support the version of you who is stepping into 2026. So today I want to explore three areas that matter when you're creating a meaningful financial reset.
Leah Hadley [00:04:24]:
One that honors your past, one that is going to support where you're at right now and really looking to strengthen your future. First and foremost, let's talk about what it means to reset your financial foundation right before the year ends. I really like to talk to clients through a simple kind of review. And it's one that you can easily do on your own. So here's what I want you to do. Start by looking at where your money actually went this year. Not where you hoped it went, but look at the real numbers. Now sometimes the truth is validating and sometimes it is surprising.
Leah Hadley [00:05:01]:
Surprising, but it's always going to be clarifying, right? So I want you to think about what surprised you. Maybe there were some unexpected medical expenses, kids, activities, maybe some unexpected travel, car repairs, home repairs. Maybe there were some, some nice surprises. I just had a client let me know they got a surprise bonus, right? So maybe you earned more than you expected, right. When challenges popped up, the moments when you felt strong, stretched thin, unprepared or caught off guard financially. So what were those challenges that popped up during the year? I also want you to think about what priorities have shifted since your divorce. Because the things that mattered to you five years ago, they may not matter today. And you want to make sure that your spending reflects where you're at now, not a life that you're not living anymore.
Leah Hadley [00:05:54]:
Right? And it's very common for us to be on autopilot and still paying for things we may not even be using. So you may want to look at if there are places you want to tighten up for 2026. Now, again, this isn't from a place of restriction, but it's from a place of clarity, confidence, and purpose. This process is not about judging yourself, and I want to be very clear about that. It's also not about reliving old mistakes. It's about understanding patterns, right? When we understand our patterns, then we can make choices that really support the person that you're growing into. When you know the truth about your money, it can start to feel lighter. Decisions start to feel easier.
Leah Hadley [00:06:40]:
You can feel a greater sense of control. And honestly, for a lot of people who have gone through a divorce, there's a loss of sense of control, right? And you can start to regain that because clarity really is power. And the goal for you to step into January feeling really grounded and not overwhelmed. So a strong financial foundation, it's not about perfection, right? It is built on awareness, intention, and the courage to really look at the full picture with compassion. And the second area that I want you to look at is resetting your earnings power and career direction. Now, this is a big, big one for many people. It's actually the place where we see the greatest transformation. It's interesting.
Leah Hadley [00:07:30]:
Divorce actually impacts earnings power in ways that are not always obvious. So maybe your career took a back seat during the marriage. Maybe you stepped out of the workforce for a while, maybe you relocated. Or maybe just the emotional weight of going through a divorce made it hard to think about your career growth, right? And then beneath it all, there's a whole nother layer that a lot of people struggle with. And that can be a loss of confidence. That's normal and I hear it all the time. For those who are really struggling in that area, who am I to ask for more? Right? People will say it feels safer to just stay where they are, or maybe they're concerned that they can't keep up or they're worried about making the wrong move. Right? All of these are normal and they're common, but they also limit the opportunities that are available to you.
Leah Hadley [00:08:22]:
So here's the truth that I really want you to hear. Your earnings power is one of the greatest tools you have for building long term stability, freedom, and peace of mind. Let me say that again. Your earnings power is one of the greatest tools you have for building long term stability, freedom, and peace of mind. Earnings More is not about chasing success. It's not about putting pressure on yourself. It's about creating choice. It's about giving yourself that breathing room, right? It's about building a life where unexpected expenses don't create the panic and opportunities don't feel out of reach.
Leah Hadley [00:09:02]:
So when you reset your career direction, you reconnect with the parts of you that may have dimmed during your marriage. Possibly, possibly ambition, you know, creativity, it's good to start dreaming again. If you're finding that you know that's something that you've got away from, you really want to start thinking about what your potential is and creating a future that feels good to you, right? Feels like yours. And it's okay to want more. Let's say that again. It's okay to want more, it's okay to ask for more. And you deserve to feel empowered in the work you do, not intimidated by it. Stay tuned because I'm going to give you a great resource.
Leah Hadley [00:09:43]:
If this is an area that you're working on in 2026, at the end of the episode, the last area, I want to talk about the reset in. And this is really important because it really impacts absolutely everything. But that's your emotional bandwidth. And let's be honest, none of this, not budgeting, not planning, not career growth works if you are exhausted and emotionally stretched. Th your emotional bandwidth is part of your financial bandwidth. When you are depleted, everything feels harder. The math gets harder, the decisions feel heavier. Even small tasks require more effort.
Leah Hadley [00:10:25]:
And that's why really getting in tune with your emotional capacity is crucial to be able to reset your financial life. So I want you to ask yourself, what drained me this year? Now, I'm not asking this to revisit a painful time, but again, we want to look at the patterns, right? What are the patterns that we see in our lives? Was it certain people, situations, maybe obligations.
Leah Hadley [00:10:53]:
Or expectations you put on yourself?
Leah Hadley [00:10:55]:
So I want you to look at what roles, relationships, responsibilities no longer fit the person you're becoming after a divorce. It is very common to outgrow old dynamics, and that is a positive sign that you're healing and you're moving forward. So what support do you really need next year to truly thrive? Think about that. Not just survive, but genuinely thrive. It could be childcare, support, it could be emotional support, professional, community, right? Give yourself permission to rest. Give yourself permission to rest. That might be just what you need. Women often try to rebuild alone because they have been conditioned to be the one who holds everything together.
Leah Hadley [00:11:48]:
But rebuilding your life is not meant to be a solo mission. It is okay and necessary to let others help you. I want you to remember that support isn't indulgent. It's what allows you to grow. When you protect your emotional bandwidth, you make better financial decisions, you make clearer career choices, you make more confident plans for your future. I want to explore what people commonly get wrong about New year planning. I think that that'll be helpful. We think about planning for the new year, especially after a major life change like a divorce.
Leah Hadley [00:12:25]:
It is very easy to fall into patterns that feel familiar, but ultimately they keep you stuck. Now, I see it all the time, not because people aren't capable or motivated, but because they are carrying so much emotional, financial, mental weight. Right? It really does really keeps them stuck. Right. So let's take a deeper look at some of those common mistakes, why they happen, and how you might approach things differently this year. So, first and foremost, so many people say, I'm just gonna wait till January to figure things out. And it is one of the biggest common misconceptions that January 1st is this official start of the new beginning. So in reality, January can actually be a pretty hard month to create.
Leah Hadley [00:13:21]:
Create that meaningful momentum that you may need. Honestly, people often are exhausted after the holidays hit, right? They might be out of their routines. You know, kids are out of school, then they're back in school. Maybe you took time off of work, and you might be coming back to, you know, work that's piled up. It, quite frankly, is very common for people to reach January feeling behind before it even starts. So that is what's nice about thinking about these things now and talking about these things now. Right? December offers something incredibly valuable, and that's space. Even if it's busy, there is a natural pause that we see in the rhythm of our lives.
Leah Hadley [00:14:05]:
It gives you a moment to reflect, to recalibrate, to make grounded choices before the chaos begins. So when you wait till January, you're planning from a place of pressure, but when you start in December, you're planning from a place of intention. And that shift in timing, just that shift in timing alone can actually change the whole trajectory of your year. Now, another misconception is setting goals without understanding your cash needs. Now, this is a big one that we work very closely with our clients on, but many women do set goals, goals based on what they want without first looking at what they need. And that it's not a character flaw, right? It's just that most of us were never really taught how to do this properly. So let's say you have goals like, you know, maybe you want to save more, you want to rebuild your Emergency fund, maybe you want to take a vacation with your kids, right? We want you to have a really clear understanding of your cash flow, right? What it costs, costs to run your life. So that way those goals don't become overwhelming.
Leah Hadley [00:15:15]:
But really, it's an empowering process to plan for those goals, right? You really can't create a confident plan if you don't know the true numbers behind it, right? And when you have gone through a divorce, those numbers often shift dramatically, right? And even years after the divorce, those numbers may shift dramatically. Child support may change, alimony may end. I mean, we certainly have seen plenty of inflation, expenses increasing, careers evolve. There's new financial responsibilities that may come up. When you know your cash needs, your goals become strategic instead of stressful. And it really allows us to create a realistic plan instead of an aspirational one, right? That's when really things start to become meaningful. Another common mistake that people make is trying to do everything alone. Now, this one runs deep, especially for those of you who went through a divorce and were shouldering more than your fair share.
Leah Hadley [00:16:21]:
You may have spent years feeling like everything depended on you. You may have learned that relying on people wasn't safe and it wasn't consistent. Or maybe you got used to being the strong one that you don't even realize how rarely you let yourself be supported. But here's the truth. Rebuilding your financial life after divorce is not meant to be a solo journey. When you try to navigate career decisions, budgeting, goal setting, parenting, your emotional healing, the entire process of reinvention by yourself, it's exhausting and it's just not necessary, right? Support creates clarity. It can help with momentum. Accountability gives you the space and the emotional safety to breathe again, right? Letting people in does not make you weak.
Leah Hadley [00:17:16]:
Letting people in does not make you weak. It makes you resourceful. And you deserve that, right? Now, assuming your income will fix itself is another common mistake that I see people make. And this one is sneaky because it actually does feel logical, right? Sometimes people are like, well, I can get through this season if I can just manage everything going on with the kids, or I just get my feet under me, the income will come, right? I'll get a raise, I'll get a bonus. Something's going to happen. But here's the problem. Generally speaking, income does not increase without intention. People often underestimate how much they can earn, how much their experience is worth, and how much power they actually have in the workforce.
Leah Hadley [00:18:06]:
And after a divorce, many, many fall into patterns like staying in a job that doesn't pay enough, avoiding negotiations, doubting their school skills, or quite honestly, even just feeling guilty for wanting more but earning more. It's not about being greedy and it's not about being ambitious just for the sake of being ambitious, right? It's about building stability. It's about freedom and choice for your future. It's about giving yourself the life that you want, not the one that you feel like you're stuck with. But income growth does require clarity, strategy, and a plan, right? And the good news is that you can learn how to do all of those things. And regardless of where you're starting, it is not too late, right? You're not behind. You simply may maybe haven't had the right tools or support yet if you're feeling stuck in that way. But the good news is every single one of these mistakes that I talked about, every single one of these patterns is fully changeable, right? You can start shifting them as soon as today.
Leah Hadley [00:19:10]:
And even the smallest shift, even the smallest shift, like choosing to look at your finances in December, right? Asking for this, asking for support, exploring career, new career possibilities, any of these can actually change your whole experience. In the new year, I want to walk you through a very short, guided reflection. If you are in a place where you can, you know, take some notes or write something down that might be helpful for you. But regardless, I want you to ask yourself, what am I proud of from this year? Keep in mind, small wins count, right? Small wins matter. What am I proud of from this year? What drained me emotionally or financially? Keep in mind that awareness is always going to be that first step in shifting patterns. So we want to start to recognize some of these patterns. So what drained you emotionally or financially over the last year? The next question is, where do I want more ease in my life? I want you to really look at ease. Choose ease on purpose.
Leah Hadley [00:20:37]:
Now, I work with a lot of business owners and sometimes we talk about the friction that people create in their business, right? What keeps them from growing their business in a meaningful way? Where's their friction? Where can you make things easier on yourself? What kind of support do you want around you in 2026? Remember, you don't have to be the strong one all the time. Is there maybe a faith community that you want to get involved in or some kind of a club? There's so many online groups, right? There's so many opportunities to find connection. But we have to be intentional, right? And we have to recognize that if we're trying new things, the first thing we try may not be the right thing and maybe it's a learning experience, then we find the right fit for us. Really think about what kind of support do you want around in 2026? What is one decision that would make the biggest difference for you financially next year? Now, I know this can be a tough one for some people, but I want you to trust your intuition. The answer actually usually comes pretty quickly if you're open to it. So what is one decision that would make the biggest difference for you financially next year? So if you didn't get a chance to write your answers down to these questions, you may want to revisit this section of the podcast episode. It's a really good exercise to help you reflect on kind of where you are and where you want to go. And I will tell you, I teased you before that if part of your fresh start does include earning more or stepping into a new career chapter, or maybe finally aligning your income with the life that you're creating for yourself, I want to personally invite you to join a workshop that a friend and career expert Cindy Haba and I are hosting in December.
Leah Hadley [00:22:44]:
And actually when this airs, it'll be next week. So if you're watching, if you're listening to this when it airs, this is happening next week. It's called Earn With Intention. It's Career and financial strategies for 2026. It's happening on December 8th at 7 o'. Clock. And it really is designed specifically for those who want to feel empowered, aligned, and really confident in their earnings going into the new year. So we're going to talk about things like reconnecting with your earnings potential, mapping out your income goals for 2026, positioning yourself for promotions, raises, or maybe a career pivot.
Leah Hadley [00:23:25]:
We're going to talk about how to use your money intentionally to really support this next chapter of your life. So if this resonates with you, I would love to have you join us. I will be sure to include the link to register in the show notes and it is completely free and a wonderful resource. I'm so glad that Cindy was open to doing this with me. I think it's going to be wonderful. I want to thank you for being part of this season. I know how deeply personal this divorce journey can be, and it truly is an honor that you are allowing me to walk alongside it with you. I want you to remember that you are capable, that you are resilient, and that you're worthy of a future that feels aligned, that feels grounded and full of possibility.
Leah Hadley [00:24:14]:
And if this episode spoke to you, I just want to encourage you to share it with somebody who may need the encouragement today. And of course, stay tuned because I have already started conducting interviews for Season five and it is going to bring even more powerful conversations, insight and support to continue helping you to create the life that you deserve. Until next time, take good care.
Leah Hadley [00:24:43]:
Thank you for joining me on Intentional Divorce Insights. It's a privilege to share this time with you. I hope each episode offers valuable guidance to navigate your journey. If you find our content helpful, please leave a review to help others discover the benefits of intentional decision making in Divorce Course. Until next time, take care and continue to embrace your path with intention.
